Relationship & Couples Therapy
"Why isn't this working?"
Are you and your partner struggling with a pattern that you can’t seem to change?
Do you feel like things are great, and suddenly, somehow, your communication just seems to miss the mark?
Have the same issues in your relationship come up time and time again?
Are you grappling with work, parenting, or other stressors that keep impacting the quality of your relationship?
Relationship therapy might be the extra support you need to get your relationship back on track.
Relationships are hard work. Therapy can help make it easier.
Relationships are hard, and romantic relationships can sometimes be the hardest. Perhaps you feel like you’re a great communicator in your other relationships, but with your partner, you just can’t seem to get it right. Maybe the spark is there, but the pattern has worn down the fuel tank, and things are starting to sputter. Therapy can help you and your partner catch that pattern in action, and learn how to change it before things start to spiral out of control. I’ve helped couples learn how to trust each other again, bond, and begin a new, more intentional way of engaging with each other that feels safe, comfortable, and productive. I have a strong belief that behavior makes sense, even if the reason why isn’t immediately obvious.
Working together, we can look at what old programming and conditioning may be affecting your relationship. You will each learn how to better manage and eventually overcome the triggers that keep you from having that close and intimate bond you long for and get back to the love you each deserve.
Struggling to communicate can be one of the most painful experiences with our most important person(s). We all inherit different communication styles and expectations and bring those with us into relationships. This is especially true in relationships with different neurotypes (ADHD, Autistic, Allistic, etc.) A deeper understanding can create a more open conversation. I will help you uncover and understand those differences, as well as help you create new, meaningful ways of engaging that are true and right for your relationship.
A new relationship is such an exciting, and sometimes scary, experience. Maybe you've struggled in the past and want to make sure you "do it right" this time around. Maybe you like to create an intentional and conscious relationship with your partner, and want extra support during that creating, now that the shiny has dimmed and the realities of being together are settling in. Wherever you are, I can help support your relationship blossom or decide how to maintain or let go of the bloom.
As we all know, life (and love) can be messy. Sometimes a relationship is working until it's not. Sometimes a new baby, business, move, or health issue can create a pothole a couple finds hard to escape. Therapy can be a safe place to reorganize your relationship and find ways to overcome the road bumps or figure out if perhaps it's time to exit the vehicle. I can help you work through or decide if you want to work through your relationship without judgment and with complete care as you navigate these difficult times.
My Philosophy on Relationship Therapy
Working with you and your relationship is a deep honor, and I acknowledge that it can sometimes feel strange and scary to let someone, even a therapist, into such a sacred and intimate space. This philosophy comes with me as we work together, meaning my primary goal is to create a feeling of safety and nonjudgement in our work together. The relationship is my client, and while I want to get to know each individual who makes up the relationship, I do not take sides, and therefore do not keep secrets for one partner or the other. In my own life and with my clients, I see how our worldviews, neurotypes and experiences shape us in ways that can be confusing to our significant others, and I work to help you and your person better understand that shaping, to give you choice and agency over how you want your relationship or marriage to look. I collaborate with you in our sessions rather than give you a cookie-cutter idea of what your relationship should look like. This means I support relationships of all kinds, in all communities, of any gender: monogamous or consensual nonmonogamous, queer, Trans, gay, lesbian, bisexual, kink or vanilla, cohabitating or not. There are as many relationships as there are individuals, and that is the great joy of being together.
While I use a variety of "tools" during therapy, including couples therapy, I have extensive training in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and the Gottman Method Therapy, Level 1 & 2. Through the Denver Family Institute (DFI), I worked specifically on couples, marriage, and relational therapy via intensive coursework and clinical experience while under the supervision of some of the best and most experienced relational therapists in the Denver area.
I also have lived experience as a neurodivergent person (Autism, ADHD), and while each person is unique, this allows me a special insight into the ways our neurotypes shape our communication and understanding.
COMMON RELATIONSHIP ISSUES I SUPPORT
Lack of or Change in Intimacy/Sex
Preparing for a Life Transition
Maintaining a Healthy Relationship
Navigating Consensual Nonmonogamy
I am Neurodivergent, LGBTQIA+, and Kink affirming, and work daily to be aware of and create an anti-oppressive space for therapy. I strive to be culturally responsive and recognize that each individual has their own experience of their culture and intersectionality, and I also do not always get it right. Know that I will correct my blind spots.